How'd they do that? With MOVIE MAGIC!

What are the major things involved in any one person's life? Finances? Relationships (whether platonic or romantic)? Your car? Your house/apartment/cardboard box? Your job? Your family or furbabies? 

Well, it seems as though most of those things in my life are crashing and burning. My family is doing well, as are Lucy and Rabs, so no worries there. My car and house are tied in with wonky finances, so I'm guessing that's all just one issue. Regardless, I'm finding myself increasingly frustrated with... well... myself... as well as almost everything around me. 

So what the hell do you do when life goes from being a positive influence (like a friend that helps you study for a big exam; or brings you soup when you're sick; or shares their whiskey with you because it's better than the cheap shit you brought to the party you're both attending) and starts acting like a total dick (like someone that sits in front of you at the theatre and plays Angry Birds with the brightness on their iPhone at 100%; or that asks you what you think about something, only to correct your opinions with their different, but "more right" opinions; or tells you they don't care where you two go eat and then shoots down every single suggestion you offer)? 

And don't try to talk to me about life giving you lemons, blah blah blah. I've played Portal 2, and lemons will never be the same. However, I highly doubt that combustible lemons will solve my current problems. 

When I'm at my lowest, stuck with lemons with nothing to do with them, I find very few things that help me get through all the bullshit. Painting is a good distraction from negativity, and reminds me that I'm not a total failure at everything (because while my art is not incredible, it's above average, and that's reassuring). Lucy is a fucking trip, and the attention and positive interaction I get from strangers while with her at the dog park (not to mention the snuggles and hysterics she provides) always manages to lighten my mood.  Making lists with at least three points is also good for making shitty situations/circumstances/checking account balances feel less shitty.

But, you know, it's rare and amazing when another person (whether one you know well, or not so well) steps in and manages to accidentally, drastically alter your mood for the better. And you can never tell that person how horrifically hopeless you were feeling, or to what extent they managed to pull you out of that emotional Bog of Eternal Stench. 

So thank you. If you've ever said anything, knowing that it would make someone feel good (especially unsolicited), thank you. If you've gone out of your way to be a thoughtful bastard to a person you hardly know, thank you. And if you've ever shared your top shelf whiskey with an almost complete stranger because she can only afford Jim Beam, thank you. 

Everyone needs that sometimes. And it's incredible how often some random act or random words of kindness will be all that even the most dejected person needs in order to take those first steps, and climb out of the hole they've been wallowing in. 

I'd share my Balvenie 191 with you guys anytime. 

<3

Death by sleeping poorly

I'm slowly but surely dying (more so than normal, I mean).

My neck and right shoulder are KILLING ME. Why, you ask? Well, I tend to hunch over my work, or my studies, or the canvas I'm working on. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I carry a backpack and a portfolio around on my shoulder. I don't have an in-between in my Honda Fit to rest my arms on. I sleep on my side, in the fetal position.

All of these things are working together to kill me, I'm sure.

So between that and the THREE exams I have this week, I've been short of time/energy/patience to post as of late. Forgive me, find me amusing, and smile. Or, you know, get the fuck over it (because at least your neck/shoulder/back isn't trying to KILL YOU).

xoxo, etc.,

Me. 

Take out your suck it and you SUCK IT! (Suck it!) SUCK IT! (Suck it!)

Do you ever have one of those exhausting days where you feel like everyone is conspiring against you, and that people secretly feel generally annoyed whenever you walk into a room, and no matter what you do in or with your life you'll be wrong? And then, if you even CONSIDER talking to anyone about these odd, unfounded thoughts they choose the moment you approach them to talk about this whiny friend of theirs, or how needy this or that person is, or how busy/irritated/exhausted beyond the point of caring about anything they are? So then you just isolate yourself, feeling bad for doing so but knowing that being around people would make you feel even more upset, despite there being no reason at all for thinking/feeling the way you do?

Well, I never have days like that. And if I did, today most CERTAINLY wouldn't be one of them. And if it were, I would NEVER passive-aggressively moan and groan about it on my blog.***

Anytime I find myself feeling upset about nothing in particular (and, often, when I actually have a reason for being upset) I end up feeling guilty about it. Not the, "I just stabbed and buried a man that I thought was trying to kill me, and then found out he was just coming to give me a hug and tell me I'm awesome" kind of guilty. Just the, "I have a place to live, food, friends and dogs that love me, a cat that has yet to murder me in my sleep, a nice car, and am able to continue going to college full-time, so what the fuck is my problem" kind of guilty.

I suppose I ought to paint a lot and drink a little (wait, reverse that) and try to get out of my head (without the use of hallucinogens, of course).


I've decided to post a list of things that make me feel better when I'm being ridiculous like this. Maybe, hopefully, I can help pull someone else out of a similar, pointless funk.

-I love Bjork. She's hysterical, and an incredible musician. One thing that I love slightly more than Bjork is when people do impressions of Bjork. The best I've seen so far is right here.

-One of my FAVORITE comedians is a man named Dylan Moran. He has some awesome stand up that you can find around the internet, but his best work (in my opinion) is a series he wrote and starred in. It's called Black Books, and it's absolutely hysterical. The first episode isn't the best ever, but every episode has something to offer.

-Web comics make me happy, too. I have two that are my absolute, without a doubt favorites. There's Rock, Paper, Cynic, which is always one panel with brilliant text.  The other is Darwin Carmichael is Going to Hell. It's more story-oriented, so it's best to start at the beginning of that one. But it's awesome. My favorite is Skittles, the manticore.

Okay, that's enough for now. I'm going to listen to some Dylan Moran stand-up and find my art stuff. Though finding the sites for all of my favorite things (in order to link them) has made me feel much better already.

I promise, my next post will be FAR more entertaining than the past two. Happy Wednesday!

***These three statements are entirely untrue.