It's funny how quickly circumstances can consume everything around you. They can completely blur the path you've been trying to carve out for yourself, so much so that you end up wondering if that's really where you wanted to be, or if it's just random fog. Circumstances can cause you to neglect the person you've strived to become for so long that you end up devolving into some flawed version of yourself that you swore you'd never be. They can distract you to such an extent that sometimes, on rare occasions, you can't even find your whiskey after coming back inside from a 5 minute, impromptu smoke break.
And where the fuck is my whiskey, anyway?
...
Despite the perpetual stress, the anxiety, and even the AWOL beverage, I feel that there is solace in the constant whirlwind. You can find anchors, even if they're short-lived. Whether you find yourself momentarily grounded by friends, silly conversation, odd but wildly entertaining situations, or just by snuggling your obnoxious, loud-ass, snoring douche bag of a dog, you can always manage to find your core (some people call it "inner peace", but I think it's just the root of who you are).
I could go into a detailed pity party about my current job bullshit. I could whine about my personal relationships and their shortcomings. I could spend days lamenting over my insecurities that constantly tell me my life is beyond reparation...(too lazy, too unattractive, too young, too stubborn, too comfortable with cursing like a fucking sailor, too sensitive, too emotionally flippant, too undereducated, too... well... anything) to accomplish my personal goals (both old and new). But fuck that.
I can do anything I like. Not regardless of my shortcomings. Not in spite of them. But because of them. They comprise the person I am. I'll admit this, despite how smug my father will be if he reads it, but struggle builds character, damn it. And while some things I'd like to do may take eons more time, patience, effort, exhaustion, and perseverance than I'm willing to offer (or even capable of offering, at this point in my life), I can still, one day, accomplish any goal I put forth. As can most. The hardest part is accepting that I can actually do whatever I want, and committing to it enough to make it a reality. Does that make sense? Maybe?
You know, they say a positive attitude can do wonders. At 26 years old (almost 27... christ...) I'm starting to tentatively agree with "them". I mean, shit, I just found my fucking whiskey (and I'm way more excited and proud of my ability to find beverages that I put down mere minutes ago than I should be.... Be excited with/for me, damn it). And what better symbol of hope and positivity is there?
Goodnight, and all the best.
-L
And where the fuck is my whiskey, anyway?
...
Despite the perpetual stress, the anxiety, and even the AWOL beverage, I feel that there is solace in the constant whirlwind. You can find anchors, even if they're short-lived. Whether you find yourself momentarily grounded by friends, silly conversation, odd but wildly entertaining situations, or just by snuggling your obnoxious, loud-ass, snoring douche bag of a dog, you can always manage to find your core (some people call it "inner peace", but I think it's just the root of who you are).
I could go into a detailed pity party about my current job bullshit. I could whine about my personal relationships and their shortcomings. I could spend days lamenting over my insecurities that constantly tell me my life is beyond reparation...(too lazy, too unattractive, too young, too stubborn, too comfortable with cursing like a fucking sailor, too sensitive, too emotionally flippant, too undereducated, too... well... anything) to accomplish my personal goals (both old and new). But fuck that.
I can do anything I like. Not regardless of my shortcomings. Not in spite of them. But because of them. They comprise the person I am. I'll admit this, despite how smug my father will be if he reads it, but struggle builds character, damn it. And while some things I'd like to do may take eons more time, patience, effort, exhaustion, and perseverance than I'm willing to offer (or even capable of offering, at this point in my life), I can still, one day, accomplish any goal I put forth. As can most. The hardest part is accepting that I can actually do whatever I want, and committing to it enough to make it a reality. Does that make sense? Maybe?
You know, they say a positive attitude can do wonders. At 26 years old (almost 27... christ...) I'm starting to tentatively agree with "them". I mean, shit, I just found my fucking whiskey (and I'm way more excited and proud of my ability to find beverages that I put down mere minutes ago than I should be.... Be excited with/for me, damn it). And what better symbol of hope and positivity is there?
Goodnight, and all the best.
-L
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